Apparently the Republican presidential candidate fouled the air again a couple of nights ago with a statement that Mike says isn't apt to pose a long-term threat to "Ask not what your country can do for you . . ." or "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." What Mitt Romney said was something about a number of ladies' groups having provided him with "whole binders full of women."
M thinks that in a perfect world, Mitt would have (a) realized that he'd said something that sounded borderline Martian, (b) used his rapier wit to laugh the incident off, and then (c) led the puzzled crowd in a patriotic song:
"Did I say binders? Please excuse my rented lips! What I meant, of course, was handcuffs, shackles, chastity belts, and straitjackets. But seriously folks, Oh beautiful for spacious skies . . ."
Or perhaps a little play on words would have sufficed:
Or he could even have killed two birds with one stone by posing a riddle that reached out to the Latino community (which Mitt has sometimes been overheard wishing he belonged to, as it would make the job of getting elected President a lot easier). Maybe something like this would have saved the moment and picked up a few Hispanic votes: "Hey, here's a good one. What do you get when you cross that crazy thing I just said with a commercial for Mexican beer?"
Of course he might need to lose the "beer" reference on religious grounds, which would weaken the joke considerably.
On the other hand, Mike says that calling Dos Equis a Mexican beer is a bit of a stretch anymore, since the Cuauhtémoc-Moctezuma Brewery, of Monterrey, is now owned by Heinekin International, headquartered in Amsterdam. M says he wonders how many Dutch brewing jobs got "shipped to Mexico" as a result of that little transaction. I'm sensing a blog post for another day . . .
April on Substack
9 months ago
9 comments:
Buddy and M...I'll have to come back to make a lucid comment later. Right now, I'm laughing so hard I can hardly type. You guys are such a clever team! ... And M sure has that guy pegged, doesn't he? LOL!
Love this! I look forward to more political commentary from you two.
My first thought of "binders full of women" was the joy book of young Mormon girls featured on Big Love -- a sort of Sears catalog full of future Mormon wives. Not sure if this a real thing or not, but I'm guessing it's not an association Mitt wants to make.
""Did I say binders? Please excuse my rented lips! "-Brilliant!
Hey Buddy, aren't you one of the 47%?
Wow, Tess, I am so busted! Okay, true confession time: I've never paid income tax in my life. Probably never will, as I now work for free as a pretty good guard dog and bouncer. But when I was running around homeless for over a year (see my earliest blog posts), I was totally dependent on the kindness of others. It's a good thing not everyone back then saw me as a lazy bum! ROTFL. (Literally - I often roll on the floor when I laugh.)
Buddy, I needed a laugh over that binder bullshit, and you provided it. Thank you!
::rubs tummy and scratches until foot starts to go crazy::
Who wants a treat? Who wants a treat?
Gretchyn
Buddy - enjoyed the post!
I may be guilty of using only 47% of my brain (been cooped up in one of those binders too long), but have to wonder:
Is Mr. R.’s VISION OF THE PRESIDENCY:
CEO of the US, Inc.?
(Mitt-)Management OF the corporation; BY the corporate exec.; FOR the corporate profit?
Management policy: Make the lives of people in certain groups/departments of the firm so miserable that hopefully they’ll just go away? (Priority re-structuring move: down-size or eliminate benefits – and, of course, “get rid of” those pesky, profit draining Human Resources services)?
And BTW, let’s get some of those bargain-rate binder-babes into the front offices to dress the place up?
Just asking…
LOL. well, since here in the USA we don't have nice tall barbed wire fences around our factories to... er... protect the women earning peanuts from all the others who want to break in and steal their jobs, I guess binders'll have to do for now... Mitt just has our best interests at heart after all...
lol- Buddy 2012!
-kathe h.
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