Holy cow! I think I've been in boot camp! Did I get drafted?
Okay, technically it wasn't basic training. I was at sleepover camp again, this time being "boarded" (which sounds brutal enough, when you think about it). Granted, they didn't yell at me like they do in boot camp. But I sure was there for a long time--from last Wednesday until this morning, in fact! M and J are lucky that the Noah's Ark people were nice and took some time to play with me, or believe me, I'd give them all a real earful.
I was supposed to get to swim in the pool and had been looking forward to it. My "drill sergeants" (just kidding) took me over there twice, and I tried my level best--I really did. But I just couldn't make myself jump in. Everywhere I looked, it was so . . . deep! There was no place to just wade slowly in and get used to it, which, say what you will about mucky old ponds, at least they give you that option. And all the time I was trying to work up the nerve, my mind kept replaying the story M and J told me about how the real Noah built his ark to keep the different animals from drowning. There's an old saying that you can't baptize a cat, and I thought hmm . . . maybe that applies to some dogs, too. So, long story short, since I didn't see a boat anywhere in the pool, I decided to err on the side of caution and signed up for extra playtime instead.
When we got home from camp, I noticed that Arlo and Willis weren't here, and M said they'd been boarded, too, only at a different camp. Then while J went to get them, M stayed with me and gave me the 4-1-1 about why we all got boarded in the first place.
It turns out that M and J have been in Kentucky. (See? I knew they weren't standing out in the Noah's Ark lobby all this time!) They went up there to see their grandchildren, Mike and Annabelle, perform in a youth theater production of something called a play. A play is like a television story, only in a huge room instead of on a small screen, and with live, full-size people in it. And here's where things gets a little creepy, because the play, Bye Bye Birdie, is about a young rock star named Conrad Birdie who actually does get drafted and who is on his way to Army boot camp! Isn't that just the weirdest coincidence you ever heard of, since my last post was about a drill sergeant in an insurance commercial and also since Willis and Arlo and I all had to go to camp, too? And in this play, Mike (not my M but the younger one--my adoptive nephew, I think) pretends to be Conrad Birdie and Annabelle pretends to be a beautiful floozy named Gloria Rasputin. Annabelle also does a lot of singing and dancing as a member of the Conrad Birdie Fan Club.
M and J got to see the play three times and said that it was one of the best community theater productions they've ever seen. Here is a cast picture with Mike as Conrad (2nd row) saluting in his Army uniform and Annabelle as Gloria (top row) wearing her floozy suit with a green feather boa.
There are some nice video clips from the show at this link on YouTube. I especially like this one with Mike singing "Honestly Sincere":
And this one of Annabelle's Gloria Rasputin busting a move on Albert Peterson:
All in all, I guess I forgive M and J for leaving me in the slammer. It was for a good cause.
April on Substack
9 months ago
5 comments:
Welcome home from camp! Sorry to hear you're afraid of swimming. I'm afraid of sharks. Maybe next time you should whistle a happy tune. Then you might find that you're not afraid.
Welcome back, Buddy! I'm glad your stay at "camp" was pleasant and that M & J had a great trip. Get M to give you some swimming lessons! Did he tell you he used to be a lifeguard and go water-skiing and river-rafting?
"Night-owl"
Wow, Buddy; it surely is good to have you back in touch. We've missed you. Sorry you had to stay at boot camp, but glad it turned out to be not so bad after all.
Guess you missed your walks with M; now you can get back to quizzing him about things. (Tell us what he says.)
Love, Grandma
My person puts the DOG in a hotel with spa services when she goes away. She mostly leaves ME and the other cat, Jack, at home.
Yeah, she leaves plenty of food and water and kitty litter, but still. The DOG gets to hang out with other canines and the staff and get petted and groomed, while I just have that annoying pipsqueak, Jack, for company, and nobody to pet me — sometimes for a couple of days!!!
Thanks for the nice welcome home, y'all! I'm finally starting to mellow out from what was, in fact, a pretty harrowing experience.
Yo--Big Cat (aka Shamu), I saw your new blog. Nice! Also it's good to see you're a tuxedo cat. We have a tux named Arlo in our household, and he and I are friends. I'd much rather stay home with him than get boarded. Unfortunately he and our other cat, Willis, have to get boarded, too, because they hate each other and have to be kept separated. C'est la vie...
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